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Friday Morning Musings

As I sit here preparing to start another day of court transcripts and church bulletin production, I'm reading through blogs of men and women I've come to admire. I am soaking in so much truth that I figured I should share with anyone who stops by here. I didn't find much use for blogs previously, now I'm convinced. This medium, which some say is dead, is an incredible way for the men and women of Christ to open up to those who know them, and those who don't and share what's in their hearts & lives -- without having to be in every one's living room! I love it! Currently, Mark Batterson is in Germany -- and he's hearing some amazing speakers and they will hear him. Reformation. Remember that Martin Luther guy? Yeah, him. What happened to us? Tim Stevens is a brave man in my estimation. One who sees the world in ways I've never been challenged to. He ripped me right out of my comfort zone in this week of posts he's doing coming up to the election. This one in particular -- WOW! Yesterday, I read Perry Noble's blog about politics. I admire this man. I'm not sure he sleeps, I know he eats, I've seen his Tweets -- but just since I "met" him at Catalyst in early October, he's been to several different places, preached in his home church (some amazing messages getting to the heart of where women's main need is -- and men, too) and is now in Australia. He refused the term "jet lag" and after that flight around the world and below the Equator, he ate, talked, played rugby and has attended the Hillsong Men's Conference. He speaks there today. Wild. Sacrifice. What a fresh thinker -- or maybe just one who bring us BACK to where we need to be. And Pete Wilson -- can't forget Pete. Fresh thinking, too. I'm loving these men of God who think that the most important thing to do with their lives is the get out there and make a relationship with the lost so that they can bring them into a relationship with Christ. I'm ashamed to say that I've been one of those Christians who has dwelt inside the church, waiting for the lost to come and visit. And then, when they don't, we just have our own little party. Jesus didn't avoid the people who didn't think as He did. He talked to them. Even the religious ones! He touched those who lived outside any relationship with God. He welcomed them. He made them know that their life matters to the God Who created them. I gotta get there. Gotta get to the place where I'm intentional about loving those who don't think like me. Gotta get to the place where my faith isn't threatened by that. I must get to the place where the lost see something in me that isn't like what they have. And it has to be real. They know fakes. Whew! Got some serious work to do on me. I think this is gonna take a LOT of God-time. So, thank you, guys - you're touching lives, and if people will be real, you're leading them into that next step with Christ.

armadillo

So, it's five days until the election in this great nation of ours and my tendency right now is to curl me up into a ball and hide from all the garbage I hear. I'm overwhelmed. I'm stunned. I know what I believe and I know in whom I believe. I see thoughts and blogs about people thinking that a vote against the "norm" will bring about social change that the Church should have been executing long ago. That in itself frightens me. Social change can never be wrought by government mandate. It hasn't happened since FDR started the experiment, and it won't happen now. When those in power mandate that those "with" MUST give to those "without" through them, then the only ones who win are those in power as their hands and pockets and power-madness are filled. That's the secular, political side I see. Then I read Tim Stevens' blog this morning, and I am convicted. I have been more concerned about the person going into the White House than I have about my neighbors. So now I have something to mull over. Something to think about. My vote hasn't changed. I'm even thinking about going to vote early on this last day of early voting -- beat the rush as it were. Then I'd miss the social event that voting in Townsend is.... gotta think about that. My conclusion: PRAY. Vote. Live as Christ said -- which means living out His life where I am, not putting up walls that my neighbors can't breach, and wouldn't want to. Thanks, Tim. Thanks, God.

Good, Better, Best

I have a flaw. I know, I know, I like to think I'm practically perfect in every way, but really, I have a flaw (okay, I have several flaws!) What I'm talking about today is that flaw where I line up too much on my plate. I've done it on my own, without help from anyone. And each time I've added a "helping" onto it, I've scratched my head and thought, "WHAT was I thinking?" Now, being stressed isn't that big a deal, unless of course you do it all the time and give yourself a heart attack, but sometimes, pressure is good for bringing out what needs to be. This self-inflicted stuff, though -- I'm not so sure about. My fear is that in order to do what is really good about my list for today is that I might miss God's best for me. I don't want to do that. I want to be where He wants, when He wants. He's got something for me today, I know it. Maybe it's that lesson AGAIN about not putting more on my plate than I can handle. Maybe it's that lesson AGAIN about just accepting what's to be done and enjoying it instead of stressing over it, that HE is really the one in the details. I don't know. Guess that can be tomorrow's post.

Monday Morning after the Sunday Night Before

What a night last night! We were busting at the seams! I saw numerous faces from the platform that I did not know, and THAT is awesome! That's why we do the planning, praying and carrying out. It's why we keep on -- not to see unknown people, but to see them, really see them -- and let them see Christ. Let them see that God cares about them. I'll say that I'm not a kid person -- that you don't leave your kids with me if you want them back alive... but in reality, I like the little buggers. Yesterday was a good day to sit back and listen and watch. The basketball court and the area between it and the church building was covered with people. As you listened, you could hear the music from the cake walk, and the chuckles and laughter of adults winning a cake or just talking. The magic, however, was in the higher pitches. The laughter of a child who managed to pop a balloon by throwing a dart. The squeal of one who just managed to get the hula hoop over the stool or tossed a clothespin into a jar. Simple games. Simple joy. That's when I smiled. I wonder how many times God smiles when He hears those sounds of simple joys we experience? The soft gasp when we see the beautiful sunrise or sunset? The giggle when a fish jumps out of the water right in front of us? The oohs and ahhs as we see a dolphin swimming mere yards from us at the beach? The thoughtful sighs as we "discover" a truth in His word? I think He smiles. I think He arranges those moments for us, just to bring that joy bubbling to the top. I think that when He hears our squeals of delight -- oh stop it, you know you do sometimes -- He smiles. He doesn't need our approval for that sunrise or sunset or anything else, but just like we human parents give gifts to our children "just because," He gives us these things for the same reason. A loving Father. A parent. God of the universe. I find myself spending far too much time behind the lens of my camera and not enough time in just relating to those I'm taking pictures of. Maybe next year, I'll just let someone else take pictures and I'm going to sit on a bench with my eyes closed for a few minutes and listen to the joy songs and worship the One who put them in the hearts of His children.

Self-denial and Angels

The pastor said last week that he's getting back to his series on Colossians, that we'll be in chapter two this week. (At least that what I thought I heard!) So, I'm reading, among other things, chapter two of Colossians. And as ever, I'm amazed at God's word. He opens up truth and issues that are so very real today....yet it was written thousands of years ago, by MEN who had no idea what 2008 would hold. How incredible is that? Anyway, I'm reading in my NLT Study Bible, my favorite right now. Yes, it's a translation, not a paraphrase. I'm pretty picky about that. So, I'm reading happily along about how God forgave ALL my sins, how He canceled the very record of the charges against me and how He disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities, shaming them publicly by His victory over them on the cross. YES! Go God!! Then I get to this part: "So don't let anyone condemn you for what you eat or drink, or for not celebrating certain holy days or new moon ceremonies or Sabbaths. For these rules are only shadows of the reality yet to come. And Christ Himself is that reality. Don't let anyone condemn you by insisting on pious self-denial or the worship of angels saying they have had visions about these things. Their sinful minds have made them proud, and they are not connected to Christ, the head of the body." Whoa. Wow. Okay, let me break that down a bit for those of you who don't dwell in my brain. There are those in our "Christian culture" who say that there is only ONE version of the Bible. My father is one of those. He says he cannot read the Bible and understand it, yet he won't even contemplate opening the NLT that I gave him, because of some thinking that the KJV is the only one commissioned by God to be written. Dad doesn't know the history of how the Bible got into our bookstores today, and that's okay. At 84, he simply won't hear it, but there are those who are my age and in between that think that the 1611 commission by King James of England is the only version permissible to use. And they are extremely judgmental about those who do not believe the way they do. There are those in our "Christian culture" who think that the Hebrew Sabbath that Jesus celebrated is the ONLY day we're supposed to gather for corporate worship. That meeting on Sunday is somehow breaking God's laws. Some have even posted billboards and websites to proclaim this. They are really judgmental about those who do not agree. There are those in our "Christian culture" who think that we are to deny ourselves certain foods, certain drinks, certain activities (pork, wine, dance, etc). They, too, are very judgmental about those who disagree with them. There are those in our "Christian culture" who will tell us constantly that there are angels watching over us, that our Guardian Angel took care of us -- to the exclusion of our God being mentioned. In my mind, these words, penned by Paul, tell us not to be concerned with the judgment of these folks. While I am grateful that King James opened up the world of the Word for English-speaking souls, taking the interpretation of the scripture out of the exclusive hands of Roman Catholic priests, I don't think it's the end-all!! God has gifted men and women over time with the ability to take the Hebrew, Greek and Aramaic and translate it into their own language. Now, I would not trust a translation that came from one person. It would be very difficult to not let some of one's own thoughts and ideals creep into the translation. But give me a team of 70 or more people from different denominations, different areas, working together, discussing the best way to say what was originally said and I'm thinking that's not a bad thing, and it's in a language that we speak today. Did anyone ever stop to think that Jesus didn't come to this Earth and walk up to the first person He met and speak the ancient Hebrew that Abraham, Isaac and Jacob spoke? He spoke the Aramaic that was prevalent in the day that He came. He spoke to the people in the language that they could understand! He met the people's need to hear Him in their language. I believe He's still doing that by gifting people with the ability to understand the original texts and speak them in today's words -- not just English, but Hindi, Tamil, Swahili and the deepest tribal languages that were thought lost! There are those who believe Sunday worship is wrong -- I think they miss the boat. Jesus told the Samaritan woman that He met at the well that the time would come when it would not matter where God was worshiped, that He would be worshiped by all, in Spirit and in Truth. It's not about the DAY we worship. Well, yeah, sort of it is... we're meant to worship Him every breath, every day. We then gather corporately to celebrate Him. Some do it on Saturdays, some on Sundays, some on Wednesdays, some on Thursday mornings... it's just not about the DAY it's the FACT of worship! (Can you sense the passion here?) I won't get started on the drinking & dancing -- I think God's word is plain on what it speaks to both subjects. The king after God's own heart danced heartily before God and the Savior made wine -- the good stuff -- for a wedding and drank it at His last supper with his disciples. This thing about angels gets to me. There are people who will believe that angels help them, protect them and are there for them, but refuse to believe in the God who made them and the angels. I don't get it. Well, maybe I do. The enemy doesn't want them to believe in Jesus, and I suppose it fits that he would get people to think this way, that angels are harmless little cherubs who make sure we're all just fine. (Ever do a study on these guys? They are not cherubs with rosy cheeks!) Anyway -- the point of this incredibly long post is to say -- these people can't condemn me. Well, they can, and I'm sure they will. But my God says that I'm not to receive that, because those who try this are "not connected to Christ." Jesus was all about accepting and loving people where they are. He wanted the very best for them, and that was the canceling of those sin charges through His death. It wasn't about them having bacon for breakfast and reading a KJV Bible. It was about their hearts learning how badly they need a Savior and then accepting that free gift He gave. This is what we need to be about -- letting people know that they matter! Proving to people that they matter!

Meetings are the pits

Seriously, meetings are the pits, you have to get together with people you don't know in order to discuss stuff you can really handle yourself. You have to spend time away from home, and you have to prepare for them! YUCK! Then there are gatherings. I enjoyed a gathering with some of God's peeps last night. People with a passion for sharing God's message. People who desire to see communication at COTC done with the utmost effective excellence. These folks are awesome! Different backgrounds. Different experiences. Different styles. Same God. It was wonderful to be able to look at some of the issues involving communication at COTC and not just scratch my head thinking, "How can we EVER do anything about this?" and instead hear probably solutions that to that person were EASY! God is SO good! We went long at this meeting -- also a problem with meetings. I'm not the best at keeping to the time. Last night was really difficult for that, because of the immensity of the material we had to cover. We still have TONS to look at, but this elephant will just have to be eaten in small bites. Right now, we've identified a couple of issues that really demand attention immediately and we have solution-finders in place now who are going to look at them and develop a plan this very week! We'll be making some changes -- nothing major, mainly tweaks to make communication at COTC become the "getting through" that God wants it to be. I'm so excited! So, meetings are the pits. Gatherings where you seek God and His vision for the passions He placed in people -- those are pretty darned incredible. Thanks, God, You Rock!

Procrastination & Communication

So, I'm asking myself today, can procrastination and communication coexist? And I'm answering myself today (is that a dangerous thing?) -- yes they can. However, they do not do so peacefully, nor do they bring good results. For example, if you don't communicate with those you owe money to, and miss a few payments, they're going to come after you for that money -- not the payment, the whole amount. That's not very peaceful. This thing with communication in the church has really gotten hold of me. I realize now just how inept I am and how lacking this ministry has become. Not because of any intentional plan, but because of a total lack of understanding. I've been "doing" bulletins and "doing" the website and "doing" brochures and posters, etc. I have been passing on, regurgitating if you will, information. No more. I came across a quote from John Maxwell, "Information is giving out; communication is getting through." That really got to me. How many times have we wondered why people don't "get it"? How many times have ministries and leaders banged their heads in frustration because the people didn't get it? Well, it's because you gave information. You didn't communicate. Better said at COTC -- I didn't get it right. That's changing. When God opens you up and puts a fire inside you for something of Him, it's unquenchable. It's that something that says, "I MUST do this or die!" It's a vision of things the way HE wants them, and I got that in South Bend, Indiana. I sat through conferences and teaching that was incredible. I sat through a day of learning how to make the Web work for the church. I even hung around one more day to see how the church that put on this training event worked their training. (That was SUCH a God-thing!) After a night of church and dinner out with the friends I was staying with, I went to my sweet friend's room and spread all my material from the week on the floor around me, and began to dissect what God might be saying to me. I went to learn about making our church website better. I learned that I'm doing a LOT of things wrong. The largest of which is: I am DOING things I'm not supposed to be. I must say, it's not really a great feeling to have God smack you up 'side the head and tell you that. I mean, I'm doing it all FOR Him, right? Therein lay the problem. I was DOING it FOR Him, not WITH Him, and I was DOING. What He intended was that I L-E-A-D the doing. Oh. Okay. Wow. Umm, what? I'm not a leader! I'm a worker bee! I do what needs to be done. Last minute. Right there. Can't tell you how many times I've heard, "Ms. Faye, you ARE the woman!" when I've accomplished something on that last second schedule. Which feels pretty darned good, because, hey, we all like to be praised! Problem is, the real work hasn't been getting done: communication. It's not getting through. Things aren't happening. Words haven't been as effective as they should. And God finally had me away from the norm and showed me what effective communication can look like and that it takes a team that I need to get into place. I'm 'posed to be directing, not doing. Oh, God! You know I'm NOT a delegator! You know I'd just as soon do it myself, and get it done and have it the way I want it..... He said: "Yeah, I know, Daughter, but this time, do it MY way." So, tonight, we meet. We organize and we develop a team into great communicators for the Kingdom, not just COTC. And that procrastination? It's over. We can't afford it. We will have deadlines to meet and we'll have to keep them, because the next person is waiting. How awesome is that? "The next person is waiting." God's up to something here....

Nothing to say

Well, it's Sunday night, almost Monday morning. I'm "the" communicator and I really have nothing to say. Not a thing. What on earth is wrong with me? I think it has to do, ironically, with the subject of communication! I am trying to put together what I want to cover in the meeting for the Communications Team Monday evening, and finding it hard to put two cohesive thoughts together. I know that this is the vision that God gave me, though, so I'm going to go and put myself in bed for a good night's rest, then awaken to spend some time with Him and this "plan" so that HE is the One in charge of the meeting. So, there. Said something. Said nothing. God's got it. I'll just be the conduit! (Poetry, huh?)

my purpose

Darren really brought it tonight. He talked about what our purpose is here & now. What I heard:

"Life without purpose is meaningless, it's an endless cycle of futility." "My purpose is to prepare myself and others for 'over there'."

COTC's purpose from the beginning has been to help people find and grow in an intimate relationship with God. We work to help people grow into the likeness of Christ and then we share with others God's purpose and our own journey with others. We, as people of faith are to live lives that show Christ, then guide those who watch to that next step into their own relationship with Him. Those who have known Him for some time are responsible for helping new believers grow in their faith, encouraging them and showing them how it all works. Not an easy task. Also not one that we can do unintentionally. We have to know that we're being watched. Darren asked, "What do you YOU do best?" Well, I guess that would be communicate, talk, write, share information. Then, "How is God going to take THAT and use it to bring HIM glory? I'm thinking that would be by my letting Him use me to make announcements and learning how to direct the communications at the church, maybe even by publishing the book He's guiding me to write. Finally, "How can COTC help you with that?" Support, trust, love, respect. All those things that we all want, and especially if we're putting ourselves out there. I love this time where I've learned my purpose. It scares me half to death to know I'm to lead & direct others. It's so much easier to just do things myself. But He's shown me a body of volunteers who produce communication at COTC in the most excellent and effective way possible, leaving me to only direct. That alone scares me. I want to keep my hands on the jobs because I know how to do them and I have a passion for the way things are done that portray our church. Thing is, God is saying, "LET GO!" So, now, we figure out how to make this all work in real life. As Scarlett would say, "I'll think about that tomorrow, after all, tomorrow is another day."

Wednesday already???

Wow! I feel like I've lost a week! Well, maybe I have, but not really. Now, THAT is some circular thinking! I want to take some time in some separate posts to gel up what I learned at Catalyst, and put that into some action points I can live out. For now, I want to just update on where I am. This week -- Monday was great, to start with. I'd planned to sleep late and enjoy the day off after five days of full-tilt living. Then Jack called me from work to let me know that the dermatologist had called him to come back in -- that some of the tissue he'd taken from Jack's face was skin cancer and they needed to be sure they got it all. WHAM! So, I was okay with hearing that -- since he didn't say, "You must come in right away!" which means the really bad cancer - melanoma. Then, I started feeling this fear come in. It was like a blanket being ever so gently pulled up over my body and head. It was like a whisper in my ear saying, "What if..." so many things all at once. I broke down in tears. I knew that I believe that God has this all under control. I know that He will do what is the very best for Jack and me and will bring Him glory. I knew these things in my head. I could speak them. Somewhere between there and my heart that was being squeezed, though, was a disconnect. Fortunately, I was headed to a friend's house to drop off something. When I got there, I heard about how her struggles of the day had been and was able to help her some through that. I had shared what was going on with Jack. After we'd discussed stuff and I was headed out the door, this woman who would previously never pray aloud, much less stop someone to do so, stopped me, wrapped me up in her arms and placed her cheek to mine, speaking words to the Father and poured them into my heart. A friend indeed. After leaving that sweet moment, I had lunch at the Coffee House, then headed to Cades Cove. It was a beautiful afternoon, sunny and not too hot. I had my ever-present Nikon with me, and somehow managed to take 434 pictures! All the while basking in God's presence and realizing His love. It was one of those times where I didn't say much. I really couldn't. I did declare aloud that I knew that the fear was not from Him. I rebuked that moron that tries to thwart God's plans by planting fear in His people, then I just reveled in the peace and beauty that God gave me. Tuesday's visit to the doctor confirmed the news, skin cancer, yes. All gotten, yes. God in control, of course!

Processing......

I heard so much wonderful information while at Catalyst, that I'm still reeling! I'm spending some time going over the notes I took and listening to the CDs (THANK YOU GOD for the recording of the sessions!) to gather into my head what God wants me to really get. I think this time, one of the things I've learned is that so many people hear that God loves them and they don't get what that means. They hear "I love you, let's have sex" or "I love you" just before being hit or "I love you" just before being abandoned, so "love" doesn't really mean much to them. BUT, universally, we all want to know that we matter to someone. And when that "Someone" is God -- who created the heavens and earth, who speaks life into existence -- it's life-changing. It's incredible. It's astounding. And it's so very needed. People need to know that, and I'm one of the ones who is supposed to proclaim it. So, expect to hear it...a LOT. The thing I really love about going to events like this is that even though I've walked myself silly and am physically worn out and mentally overloaded, I feel a stronger sense of His purpose in my life. I'm learning His calling for me. I'm learning to not be in awe of the men and women who spoke from the platform, but of the God Who called them to be who they are and share that passion with the rest of us. This evening, Jack and I are serving at the hospitality tent at the Foothills Fall Festival. We've done this for a number of years. We've met several of the artists who play for the crowd and have found them to be generally nice people. There are some who believe the press about themselves, but for the most part, they are "just people." We've learned that they seem to appreciate folks who aren't enamored with their notoriety and fame. I guess that's why we keep going back. It's like a mission to share some love with them that isn't because we're adoring fans, but because we're believers. We like for them to know they matter to God, because whether they are famous or not, they need to know that they matter to God so much that He died for them.

Catalyst Day 1

My mind is still reeling! So very much information. Such wisdom imparted from that stage today. I will write more about it, but today's speakers talked about the things that are wrong with church leadership, with how we human-being-type leaders screw up what God has planned, and the amazing vision God has for us, and how to get there. A couple of highlights:

• If you have more than THREE priorities, you have NO priorities.
• If your spouse feels like your "other" is the church, you are ruining the very thing you have responsibility for.
• There's more in you. Don't stop.
• Stay in the process, don't hate it. Keep doing.

Good thing I took notes, because this is going to take time to process -- some of it will take time to even get my mind around! Gotta get packed and in bed soon, the whole thing starts all over again in the morning!

Catalyst Lab Day

Catalyst Labs. Time with an author or church leader in a "small" group setting. Small is relative, because -- these groups are probably 300 or so. But it's not 12,000. So, I went to hear Perry Noble. He talked about what to do when you feel your passion waning. Four very significant questions, borne from Isaiah 49.

• How much time do I spend LISTENING to God? Uninterrupted, consistent time with my heavenly Father?

In the end, God won't ask how big your ministry was, He will ask, "Were you faithful?"

• Am I more concerned with being DISCOVERED or DEVELOPED?

Am I willing to stay on the journey and not be discovered, but be developed by God into the person He has called me to be?

• Am I believing any LIES?

Am I running from things that are stupid things? Like a man running from a goose? I need to go back to the place I was when He found and called me.

• Am I taking RISKS or playing it SAFE?

God-sized vision takes God-sized risk. Am I living and operating just one risk from breakthrough? What is it? So, I come away thinking about what I learned at Innovate and think -- CONFIRMATION. There was the same at the Unplugged event last night with the Deadly Viper guys. That was cool! To hear again from God that I really do have a purpose and vision FROM HIM. Can't beat that. I met and spoke with and prayed with Anne Jackson. Even more confirmation. Awesome. Lord, help me thrive in this vision, this passion YOU'VE given me. Help me love You with a crazy, unending, unyielding love! Help me see the timing, the steps, the ways You want me to move. I love being on this journey! Thank You for choosing me!

sadness

I learned of something that is so very sad this evening. A lady that I've known for some time at a church we were previously members of has taken her life. She was a sweet, loving woman. Her smile from the choir loft made everyone in the room feel welcomed. Her husband of 37 years died in mid-August and she never was able to get back to living herself. She withdrew from church, from family, from life. Sad. I do not condemn what this lady did. Her heart was broken and she didn't know where to turn for relief from her pain. I wonder what I would have done. And I wonder what any of us who knew her could have done.

Encouragement

A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. That's Proverbs 25:11 in the NIV. I just received one of those apples of gold. Someone just mentioned in an e-mail -- almost as an aside -- that they love my announcements at church. I can't begin to say how those few words bless my heart. I deal with doubt in my calling sometimes, and hearing from others that what I've done or said has inspired them or helped them, or that they love whatever it is really helps me know that I'm right where I'm supposed to be. Not that I'm seeking the approval of people (Galatians 1:10 -- one of my life verses) but it's good to hear that my service to the Lord is making a difference in the lives of people. So, if you're reading this and you're at the end of your rope, needing encouragement -- ask God for it! Tell Him you really need confirmation that you're doing what HE has called you to. He'll let you know, just be ready to hear and accept it. (That's part of the deal, when people encourage you, just say "thank you.") If you've seen someone doing something and it has helped you -- let them know it! As for me, I'm going to keep on doing my "thang" -- that "thang" that God has given me to do and be! It really rocks to stop trying to fit a manmade mold and slip so comfortably into the mold that God made for me!

Getting Help

The longer I live (or the older I get) the more I realize that I simply MUST ask for help, whether it's getting a teenager to show me how to text using my cell phone or getting a webhost support person to walk me through each step of getting a website up and going. There's no shame in asking. I'm slowly learning that hard truth. I've been one who thinks she has to KNOW, even though untrained. Now, I'm learning that is all part of God's plan. He gifts us with talent and knowledge right when we need it and He intends that we will cooperate with each other for His glory. Sounds easy. Harder in the reality of the "doing". I'm learning, though, and I will learn more. There are people at COTC who know a whole lot more than me about publishing, about creating a DYNAMITE website, who have creativity oozing from them. Me? I bully software into doing what I want it to! Thank God for placing those people in our church!

Amazed

Sometimes, I feel like God just blesses me when I really don't deserve it. Which then makes me think, when DO I ever deserve it? I went through a stressful day yesterday. I really don't like conflict. Not on my own behalf. I'll go to battle for my kids, my husband or my friends, but for myself -- I'd just as soon hide. I have a home-based business where I work for court reporters. I have worked for a certain reporter on several jobs since June. Mid-September, she decided that the work I'd done for her was not to her liking. The thing is, I had done the job she contracted with me to do. Because she didn't like it, she offered to pay me only half because it was "just so bad" and she had to do so much. Kinda like saying you're only going to pay the hair stylist half for that haircut because you don't like it and you re-styled it when you got home. Well, I let her know half wasn't going to get it and that I expected full payment by 9/30. I didn't get it, so that left me on October 1st deciding how to handle conflict. A good friend counseled me in the use of what's known as a "demand letter," even supplying me with an example. The idea is that I would e-mail it to her then send it by certified mail, too. When I sent it, I got an e-mail back from her saying that a check would be arriving at my door anytime via Federal Express. Oh! I was excited! She'd decided not to fight me. Trouble was, when I got the check, it was for her discounted amount. So, here's another decision: cash the check and accept the shorted amount? Send the check back and say send the right amount? What? Again, other businesswomen counseled me, telling me to seek legal advice before acting. NEWSFLASH! There are good attorneys out there! One serves in Franklin, Tennessee and very kindly gave me the words to say in my return demand letter to her. He said to keep it simple, tell the truth -- this partial payment was not acceptable and that she needed to issue another check for the correct amount. Meantime, I had done some research and found out the business associations she is part of and let her know that if she didn't want to pay, that I would begin litigation AND file complaints with those organizations. Then off to church. Anthony talked about not worrying. Stan spoke about not worrying. Tony told us to gather around our tables and pray for each other. We talked about our concerns around the table and mine was this. It was consuming too much of my time, too much of my energy and too much of me. I asked God for peace, regardless what happens. When I got home, there was a message on the answering machine telling me to call her. It was left at 6:15 p.m. The time when I got it was 8:45. I determined to call her in the morning. When I checked my e-mails, I found one from her at 6:27 telling me that a second check was on its way via FedEx that would make up the total I'd invoiced her when put with the first one. In that same e-mail, she said if I insisted on getting it through PayPal, I would have to send the information. Somehow, around 7:20 p.m. (was this the moment we were praying?) she had a change of heart and looked back through old e-mails to find my PayPal information and sent me the entire amount I'd billed her for! When I saw that, I was amazed. Why? I don't know, I knew God could do that. But why did He choose to bless me so incredibly? Well, I gotta admit, the dance I did wasn't pretty, but it WAS filled with joy and excitement. When I thanked her for her quick and appropriate response, and that I would send both checks back as soon as the second arrived, her reply was simple, "Thank you faye. I wish you all the best." This was from a woman earlier who had written about herself and me in the third person! That was a God-thing in itself! Amazing! So, here I am, once again amazed by God and the way He chose to handle things for me. He cares about the big things and the little things, too. I used to say, "don't sweat the small stuff" then, "it's all small stuff" -- now, I'm changing that to, "Let God handle the small stuff ---- to Him, it's ALL small stuff"

D'oh! What a Goof!

So, I came back from Innovate with a renewed purpose, a renewed vision and an excitement for where God wants to take my ministry. One of those things I needed to work on included the church website. So, I spent the better part of last week working on that. I know I need a team of folks around me to get the "doing" done, and I'm working on that. But I also knew I needed to get something done in the interim for a site. So, I had it all looking so good! (Well, for an interim thing!) And boy, was I excited. So, I tried to follow directions that I really didn't understand -- and instead of making it "live" I DELETED the thing! So, there I sat last night, head in my hands, in total despair. Thank GOD for a really great support staff on this new host! They answered my e-mail at 9:00 p.m. -- letting me know that it's not all lost. They're very patient and don't treat me like an idiot! I will HIGHLY recommend them to anyone! So, now, I will S-L-O-W-L-Y work through getting the pages in place, and then contact support to be absolutely certain how to switch things over!

Awesome!

I'm SO not a person who wants to be in front of everyone, but that seems to be squarely where God is putting me. I know I have a sense of humor that makes people think -- and He's been working on that. So, today, Darren allowed me to do the announcements. First thing I did was tell people that I was doing them because I'd grown up in Florida so I am more multi-lingual than Darren -- I say "hey y'all" "YO!" " 'sup" "hola!" "duuuude!" -- people laughed. In the second service, I think people were more awake than in the first... including me! When Darren started his welcome, he'd told everyone to take a deep breath. I made note when I got up there that he'd never said to exhale --- great laugh! Anyway -- people got the announcements and I got to experience being where God said to be, doing what God said to do. Can't beat that. Now my challenge will be getting the team put together. I know God has the people chosen.... just have to get them to realize that!

Newness

So, I go off to this thing at Granger Community Church in South Bend, Indiana for a conference called "Innovate '08" The whole theme was "Stop Talking - Start Doing." I confess when I started out listening to the speakers, I kept thinking that we needed to fix this or that. Now, I knew that we must be doing something right, so in my prayer time (at Gary & Dian Brown's house, THANKS SO MUCH GUYS!) I asked God to show me the truth. Well, He did. And let me tell you, I was SO not ready for what He had to say! When I started with Church of the Cove, I had been the secretary at another church, so I just kept on doing the same thing, producing bulletins and doing the best I knew how on a web site, just doing the best I knew how on all of the things I've done. Now, I hear from the Creator that I'm NOT supposed to be doing those things. No, not that I'm supposed to stop doing what I'm doing, but I'm to make changes. I'm to direct the flow of communications at Church of the Cove. I can't explain how jazzed I felt Wednesday night when I went to church with this new vision, this new understanding of my purpose. A couple years ago, when we went through the 40 Days of Purpose, I realized that God made me with the purpose to share information. This time, He's shown me that I'm to do that very thing, except that I'm not the tasker... I'm the one who gathers the taskers and helps them move the information from source to recipient. I have resources to help me figure out how to do that, and now I'm on the hunt to find those people. God has given me some idea of how this is going to look and it's really awesome to experience! I just can't wait!